In our busy lives, sometimes it’s just too difficult to stay on top of all the YouTube videos, celebrity gossip and political catchphrases that are currently shaping the American mindscape. But never fear, as The Pop Culture Reference Guide is an ever-evolving dictionary that will help you stay on top of all the contemporary minutia and inane factoids you’ll need to feel right at home in any conversation.

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It’s a brand new year, and no doubt after the past two months of carnal debauchery which you justified because “it’s the holidays,” you’re feeling like you need to make some changes in your life. Your clothes don’t fit like they did in October, you can’t even remember most of November, and the last time you coughed you actually yacked up a complete, intact Marlboro cigarette. Yep, as wonderful as the holidays are, you woke up on January 1st feeling disgusting, and for good reason.

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After reading all the stories and seeing all the footage from the protests in Ferguson, I’m left with one question: Where was Ted Nugent?

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The recent episode of cannibalism in Miami—where Rudy Eugene, high on bath salts, stripped naked, ran into the streets and ate the face off of a homeless man—has received a lot of attention, but it’s not an isolated case. In fact, in recent months, there have been several cases where people on bath salts (a synthetic cocaine) have gone all Hannibal on complete strangers, biting toes, chewing on faces and, in one incident, munching some butt. That said, the case in Miami is admittedly the most disturbing, largely because Eugene ate a homeless person.

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If you blinked earlier today, you likely missed it when the House voted on the Prenatal Nondiscrimination Act (PRENDA), a bill that would have banned abortions based on gender. Sponsored by Rep. Trent Franks (R-Ariz.), Republicans touted the bill as civil rights legislation that would combat prenatal sexual discrimination (particularly against females). In an earlier draft, PRENDA also banned abortions based on race, but apparently Rep. Franks felt that was an option that should be left on the table, as that provision was removed.

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It’s a well-known fact that America is a nation of fat people. And I’m not talking “chubby” or “a wee bit overweight.” Hell, I’m not even talking about your garden variety level of Wal-Mart fat. Rather, I’m talking about the kind of fat that allows you to use the fold between your upper and lower belly as a purse and your bellybutton as a cup holder. And it’s not just a few of us, either. Currently, 32 percent of all adults are clinically obese. And a recent report by the US Center of Disease Control and Prevention predicts that by 2030, 42 percent of all Americans will be obese, while the other 58 percent will be hunted for food.

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In 2010, 762 Arizonans lost their lives in traffic fatalities, but apparently the State Legislature feels that’s not nearly enough. I say this because of two bills which the House recently voted on: House bills 2757 and 2125. The first bill—which legalizes the use of electronic billboards—passed in the House and will be voted on in the Senate soon. The other bill—which would have banned texting while driving—was narrowly defeated on Tuesday.

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The Internet was abuzz early this week with the news that Rep. Roscoe Bartlett (R-MD) had delivered to the House Ways and Means Committee a bill that would grant a $250 tax deduction for mustached Americans. Dubbed the “Stache Act,”* the reported legislation would help offset the cost of maintaining a properly groomed mustache.

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People learn a lot of valuable things in college, like how to solve quadratic equations, run a business, or turn a shoe into a bong. All important life lessons, to be sure, but according to Arizona Rep. John Kavanagh, students at Arizona’s universities need to be taught a lesson they’re currently not learning.

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Rick Santorum is getting a bad rap from feminists, because despite all claims to the contrary, he’d fully support the women’s movement if only they’d let men run it. Plus, you’d be hard pressed to find a more ardent defender of a woman’s constitutional right to vote the way her husband tells her to.

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